Dragon's Dogma

Yeah, that's about right.

So, I've unintentionally turned DD into my personal yuri fest. I've got a full party of female pawns, and my Arisen is chasing after Mercedes.

Things that have nothing to do with the yuri, that I've turned into yuri:

After mining the shit out of, uh... mines with my Arisen, my main pawn picked up a pickaxe of her own, walked up to where I was mining shit, and we mined together. I actually D'aww'd. I now imagine that my pawn wanted to spend more time with the Arisen, and decided to take up the hobby that she had, and now they mine together.

My Arisen was being a mo' fuckin' boss, hanging onto a flying drake, going for the wings when the drake shakes off my Arisen. This fucker was above the tree line, so the fall would have killed me, which would have sucked, until my pawn jumped and caught me from the air, and put me down. If there was a swoon button I would have mashed the hell out of it.

Seemingly my, and therefore my Arisen's, favorite thing to do in the game is to pick up people and run around with them. When I realized that my pawn didn't knee me in the chest after running around with her for a long amount of time I went ham and started running all over the place with her. The pawn just kind of flailed about lazily, as if playing along, then when my Arisen dropped her, and doubled over to take a breath the pawn put a hand on her shoulder and asked if she was alright. I D'aww'd again.

Then there is the idle animation, which is just fucking cute, where the pawn walks to my Arisen, and waves her hand in front of her face

Lol I noticed the idle animation, made me laugh. That's fucking sweet about the Drake. Wish my pawn would play hero like that.

I have a stupid pawn story:
I was in that canyon that connects Gran Soren to West Gransys, Soulflayer or whatever. Freaking Cyclops on the a small ass natural bridge so of course I had a bad feeling, saved, and then charged. Hacked the crap out of his legs until I got him to stumble right off the bridge. He plummets a mile to his death and I see one of my pawns jump into the air.

Me: *Facepalm*
Winter: "Don't do it!"

And then the fucking stupid ass pawn falls to his death, 'bravely' chasing after the soon to be dead Cyclops.

Lol, I saw that fucking cyclops on that fucking bridge and went, "Lolno". When I got to the bottom I noticed the bones of a cyclops and some loot. I looked up and noticed I was underneath the bridge. I lol'd.

Also, I had your pawn early on when I was low level, then her purple skin and blue hair started to annoy me and I changed her out.

Oh, and can we all agree that Dragon's Dogma has one of the best Nice Job Breaking It, Hero 'endings'? So, you can fight the dragon that said it would fuck off, and let you be rich and famous, if you just let him have one person, with the fate of the world hanging in the balance. You somehow manage to win, which, seemingly, the past three Arisen before you all failed to do. What do you get? The world becomes a tortured hellscape, the main capital caves in on itself, the Duke dies (not due to the cave in, but literally because you 'won'), even stronger than usual monsters rise up, and you get to bang that one chick you saved.

Speaking of that one chick I banged. I have what is basically a princess of a foreign nation living with me in my one room shack in some backwoods fishing town along with my pawns, and apparently Selene the witch. It wouldn't be so odd if it wasn't for the fact that I only own a single bed... I mean, it isn't so bad, I don't mind having a harem.

and then you die, your pawn becomes you, and you don't get a happy ending anyway.

Oh my god, this harem is an Arisen, an Arisen Pawn who is a witch, the Pawn of an Arisen who will become an Arisen Pawn I think, and the princess of some fake French place who plays at knighthood. Talk about a power couple... harem.

Also, I'm not really sure if that'll happen to the PC and the Main Pawn. It is implied that the three Arisen you meet prior were all fuck ups. I'm thinking that if you keep your heart things are a bit different.

No that's how the game actually ends. You meet god basically. Become god and kill yourself then you fall from the sky on to the beach and your pawn becomes you.

That is retarded. I hate you for ruining that by the way.

I <3 Script.

I hate the game because that's a stupid ending too but I basically expect that shit from Capcom nowadays.

I believe the Trope you are looking for is Shoot the Shaggy Dog.

That and Gainax ending.

So many spoilers -.- I haven't done shit to care about anyone. I'm pretty sure Quina doesn't even know I'm alive, I never did the Lost and Found quest and just randomly found her in the Abbey one day. Mercedes and I get along, but just more for helping her out than courting her. I threw the duchess from her fucking tower for throwing me under the bus. Don't know of anyone else.

And I know, I figured, I have the Rift Crystals, why not play around with skin and all. Since I named her Winter, I'm gonna change her skin to blue and raise her up the mage/sorcery vocations as an ice specialist with healing. Now, I'm using you're pawn though, she's badass with the pretty sword.

Gainax Ending is just an end that makes no sense, if I recall.

Shoot the Shaggy Dog is when the whole story was not only pointless, but it is cruelly ground in that the protagonist's efforts will yield absolutely no net benefit whatsoever.

Yes and both apply because the ending makes no sense.

Wait, Winter? I was running around with some chick named Syn.

Interesting, I guess it's because we are friends so we see names not Monikers. Like I see that your character name is Noct.

So that makes sense. Syn's moniker is Winter so the rest of the world sees her as Winter.

Weird, my Pawn's name is Deneve, my main character's name is Noct. I have another friend's pawn though, and I get his pawn's actual name.

Right.

I was saying when I look at your pawn's info, I see that your Arisen is Noct, which didn't make sense to me until now. I was like how the hell did he do that? So friends can see the actual names and other players see the monikers so that's cool.

It only shows the Moniker if the player has parental locks on their system.

Ah, I didn't read that part, just skimmed and thought it was some censor thing so you can run around with characters named Cunt and Cock.