Digital Mayhem

*He rockets down and spins around, drilling at the Bakemon. Razz resumes walking North*

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Hawkmon: <Where's Tae, is he all right?>

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Allina: <I still think we should steal it. All right, old man, I'm coming in. Keep your hands in your pockets though.>

*She gets on the carriage*

Revolmon:<We got jerky, jerky and more jerky. And Welcome Milk. So, come on in!>

*Revolmon enters the swinging doors of the saloon. At the far end of the bar, Peter sees a blond, librarian looking girl, glasses and all sitting on a stool while a Salamon gnaws on a piece of jerky on the counter.*

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*The Bakemon explodes into data, ExVeemon eating dirt in the process. While Razz is walking about, his right bicep begins to burn as an odd, pink symbol appears. If he flexed that arm it would probably dance or some shit.*

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Zarek:<I'm outside and I kind of need my hands on the reigns.>

*Inside are two benches on each side of the interior. The walls, floor, and ceiling are lined with purple shag except for a 3"x3" wood rectangle on the front wall a few inches from the ceiling with a knob on one side. From the ceiling hangs a disco ball and mounted in the middle of the floor is a large, plastic, blue barrel with a large screw-on lid with four straw cups sitting on top. Leomon follows them in hunched over, sitting opposite side of the others. The rectangle slides open letting in a small amount of sunlight.*

Zarek:<Didn't think it was that cramped inside.>

Leomon:<No, really?>

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"In that cave."

*Taiyo pulls her legs to her chest and wraps her arms around them before speaking in a lower tone.*

"I think he's doing dirty things in there."

Razz: <...What is this?>

*ExVeemon gets up coughing and flies over to him*

ExVeemon: <Did you notice...>

*The boy nods, rubbing the symbol with his other hand*

Razz: <Let's keep going, LadyDevimon's castle must be nearby.>

*They keeps walking north*

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Hawkmon: <I think you wanna join him.>

*She glares at Taiyo and hops over to Tsune*

Hawkmon: <Hoi, hoi. How did you get Betamon to evolve?>

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Allina: <Your perverted furry better behave!>

*Euryale makes it a point not to touch the water. She just sits staring out the window.*
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"I bet he's thinking about you. And I told you, I think the Crests are voice activated."

*It actually begins to snow. Not white like regular snow, but black. The snowflakes that land on either of them don't melt but slide off leaving a greasy black streak.*

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*The carriage begins to move slowly the thump thump thump of the saw horses legs stamping on the ground.*

Zarek:<So my choice in decorating isn't the best, it's not my fault. I got the idea from your world. Although that particular visit was in 1968 or so.>

Leomon:<There's nothing to worry about. I can assure you it's regualr water in the barrel. You have my word.>

Zarek:<He gave you his word. That means a lot coming from him living by some samurai code of honor bushido stuff. Although it is well water, so it may have a metallic after taste.>

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"Sorry to disappoint you, Hawky, but I'm strictly into girls. I bet he's thinking about Hitomi. I bet that's why their partners can do that combiny thing. 'Cause they're meant to be best friends or maybe more."

ExVeemon: <Ew!>

Razz: <Keep going.>

*ExVeemon jumps upwards and moves along hovering over Razz's head to protect him*

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Hawkmon: <Okay...Are we just gonna stand here all day? I want to try that voice activation thing.>

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*Allina starts singing country with a texas accent just cause she's boss*

"As long as it's provided by that prick in the driver's seat, it may as well be acid, for all I care."
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"You ever notice how Black Gabumon & Black Agumon never combined? I'm just sayin'."

*Eventually they come to a large scary looking castle complete with gargoyles and a dried up mote surrounding the castle. Crouched on some of the battlements along the front wall where the drawbridge is are several Devidramon. Rather than attacking they just stare down at the two eyes glowing screeching every now and again.*

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Zarek:<Suit yourself.>

*The bumpy ride begins to slow down and the carriage begins to drag.*

Zarek:<And if you look to your left you will see we are three feet out of the wasteland and have just entered the overglorified sandbox that once was a desert. And if you resume looking to your left, you will see this dingy looking saloon and to your right a dingy looking sherrifs office where our very own Leomon does sherrif things.>

*The carriage comes to a halt in the middle of a dirt road in front of the saloon*

Zarek:<Thank you all for riding Digital Carriage. Please watch your step as you exit the vehicle. As a reminder, the carriage will be leaving in... you'll find out later to return to the wasteland and is on a one way trip to LadyDevimon's Castle.>

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"It'll happen! Just you wait!"

ExVeemon: <...I think we found her.>

Razz: <Bright one, aren't you?>

ExVeemon: <Sure is showing off with the Devidramon.>

*They walk forward towards the castle*

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Allina: <Patamon, I heard Hitomi and Tae's partners merged when they were saving us.>

Patamon: <Oh... like.. DNA evolution?>

Allina: <I guess? Can you do it too?>

Patamon: <How am I supposed to know?>

Allina: <...I hate you.>

*She steps out and heads into the salloon with Patamon, stopping halfway towards the counter to stare at Hitomi and Salamon*

Patamon: <What is it now?>

Allina: <...SALAMON! DNA EVOLUTION!>

Patamon: <That's not going to work.>

Allina: <Oh yeah? Well, you're an hamster.>

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Hawkmon: <... I wonder if the others are all right.>

"Pretty sure Euryale's into guys. It's just that her choices here consist of...Tae."
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"Hey, useless asshole, aren't you forgetting something? Like...3 human somethings & 3 Digimon somethings? All with names beginning with 't'?"

*The drawbridge comes crashing down a few feet in front of them kicking up a cloud of dust and ash. They can see the drawbridge is made of a thick heavy, scorched wood. Like something they shouldn't walk on, but if it didn't fall apart when it came down, it might be okay to walk on.*

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*Both Hitomi and Salamon look at Allina like she's stupid for a few seconds before resuming what they were doing. For Hitomi it was sitting there staring into an empty mug while Salamon gnawed on a piece of jerky.*

Revolmon:<Friends of yours?>

"Sure."

Revolmon:<All righty then! What can I do ya for? We got jerky, Welcome Milk, and that's it.>

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Zarek:<From what Biyomon said they're sitting around in some forest eating raspberries.>

*Leomon drops the barrel outside the carriage then climbs out shutting the door behind him. From inside the carriage a bright light shines through the windows for a few seconds before dying down. Leomon takes the barrel and drops it beside the saloon doors then heads inside.*

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"Why must you try and hurt me?"

"I'm not staying for another minute in this run-down dirtball. Tell me where to find them."
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"Hey, I calls 'em as I sees 'em."

*They cough a bit, stepping back. Razz crosses the bridge carelessly, after ExVeemon flies across it.*

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Allina: <...Welcome Milk?>

Patamon: <I'll have what's she's having.>

*Patamon flies over to Salamon and pokes at her forehead with his nose*

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Hawkmon: <...What the hell is that supposed to mean!?>

OOC: Forgot to introduce WolfSmasher's character in my last post.

*Nate and Yaamon are wandering through Central Park having just witnessed a battle between some guys digimon and a dinosaur. The fire department is spraying down the trees that caught fire with water while trying to contain it and prevent it from spreading.*

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*Salamon growls at Patamon and backs away taking her piece of jerky with her. Revolmon fills a mug with Welcome Milk and puts a plate on the counter with six pieces of jerky.*

Revolmon:<It's regular milk, but since milk is a boring word we thought we'd make it sound interesting by throwing the word welcome in front of it.>

Salamon:<No matter how many times you explain it, it's not interesting, it's weird.>

Revolmon:<You're weird.>

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Zarek:<Even if I told you where they are you wouldn't get halfway before you keel over.>

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*As they approach, the metal grated gate rises allowing them entrance into the courtyard. The courtyard is empty except for them and the Devidramon still perched on the battlements having now turned so the two are still in view. Ahead is the entrance to the keep. The keeps double doors are a dirty, charred wood with a large metal ring hanging from some kind of dog monsters mouth.*

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"You're not trying to discourage me because you want her, are you?"

"I'm just saying, Tae isn't very mature. And no, I'm not very much attracted to breast tumors, thank you very much."
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"I recall asking you one question, & that was not a valid response to it. Try again, & try HARDER."

Nate: <That was...>

Yaamon: <Yeah....>

*The two of them are frozen in shock.*

Patamon: <You no want friendz?>

*He pokes flies over and pokes her again, giggling*

Allina: <...I'll have the milk.>

*She goes over to the counter and sits next to Hitomi*

Allina: <Hey...Hitomi, how did Salamon merge with Hawkmon?>

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*ExVeemon tries to push the doors opened, Razz looking around at the Devidramon*

ExVeemon: <Can we do this by ourselves?>

Razz: <You've seen them.>

ExVeemon: <Point taken.>

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Hawkmon: <Well, screw you, Tae's still better than Taiyo and Allina.>

*A branch falls off a tree a few feet away from them kicking up embers.*

Firefighter:<Hey you, get away from here!>

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"I don't know."

*Revolmon slides the mug and plate across the counter, both stopping in front of Allina.*

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Zarek:<Or what, you'll have trouble breathing on me?>

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*The door bounces back a bit like it would if it were a pull door being pushed.*

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"You're always mentioning her breasts, you know that? I think they're magnificent, but I'm not talking about her as if that's all there is to her."

*She sips the milk, staring at Hitomi, then sighs and walks over to the window the the mug*

Allina: <...Okay, thanks.>

Patamon: <...You are the sun that makes my life brighter!>

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ExVeemon: <This is so creepy.>

*Razz walks inside*

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Hawkmon: <Oh god, boob talk again.>

"Implying they aren't. Also, I bet they're fake."

*She looks at Hawkmon.*

"You keep thinkin' that, kid."
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"Or I'll kill you."

*Nate and Yaamon immediately burst out of the way and keep running.*

*They come to a small footbridge over a stream. In the middle of the birdge a portal opens and a floating cogwheel comes out.*

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*She can see Zarek and Euryale bickering and arguing as usual. Underneath the windowsill is the barrel that was in the middle of the carriage. Zarek jumps off the seat of the carriage and walks over the barrel scooping a cup up from beside and grabs on to the lid's handle and turns. Allina hears a popish sound as if Zarek opened a can of pop instead of a barrel of water. Removing the lid fog rises up fogging up the base of the window before it spills to the ground. Allina can see that the barrel is full of clear water as Zarek dips the cup into the water filling it and drinking from it making sure Euryale can here each gulp he takes before letting out a long 'ahhh'*

Zarek:<Refreshing. Sure beats the taste of death you probably have in your mouth. Providing you can still taste anything at this point.>

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*Inside they're greeted by thedominatrix of their dreams. The entrance hall is a large, round room with many tall windows and a large chandellier hanging from the ceiling. Behind LadyDevimon is a large door. It'd be a nice place if it weren't covered in soot, ash, and dust.*

LadyDevimon:<Only one? And an ugly one at that. That just won't do one bit.>

*LadyDevimon dashes at ExVeemon, her clawed hand extending and joining into large spear.*

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"They sure felt real."

*Taiyo scurries over to Tsune on all four then leans forward so her face is barely an inch away from Tsune's*

"You don't like Euryale much or at all, do you?"

*Yaamon hops forward as Nate steps back a few feet.*

Nate: <Is that...>

Yaamon: <Yeah, a Digimon!>

*Yaamon's eyes fix on the floating gear.*

*Euryale dunks his head into the water, holding it there for several seconds before withdrawing it.*

"Stop wasting my time, you worthless piece of garbage! I demand that you tell me where they are right now!"
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"You're too close."

Razz: <ExVeemon!>

*ExVeemon just barely dodges her claws, punching at her face*

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Allina: <Patamon, what the hell are you doing?>

Patamon: <Salamon, my love, my joy.>

Allina: <Someone's been reading tacky poetry.>

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Hawkmon: <I bet Tsune is jeaaaaalous. Or maybe she just thinks Tae's better.>